no more duck duck goose at the bar
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
