grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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