no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
