Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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