I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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