Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You are a genius and a whore.
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