yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
