how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
