I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Randomize