Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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