I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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