take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
