No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
pray to the hookup gods
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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