So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize