direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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