omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Randomize
