I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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