Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
