"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
