i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
