I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
