Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
