I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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