i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
