the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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