whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize