i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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