I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
