Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
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When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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