MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
