i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Randomize