I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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