Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
