3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
