What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize