How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize