Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
