Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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