Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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