He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
