it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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