whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Randomize