I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
