Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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