I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
