Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
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she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
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It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.