Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
