so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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