thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
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Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
