You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
