do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
