so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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